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3 steps to ultimate confidence

Written by: Galit Lazar, Confidence and Prosperity Coach

What is the secret to happiness and abundance?

Why do some people have more and others struggle?

Well the answer is that your life starts in one place and that is with one person... you!

The first step for transformation starts with how we feel about ourselves, the way we perceive ourselves from the inside and out. Sounds easy right? Well it is not. There is no magic wound that is going to make it all well in a second, it takes work, ambition, perseverence and a coach. Yes, you heard it, and a coach. A coach has the ability to help you gain awareness of your subconscious mind, and help you overcome the obstacles that prevent you from reaching your dream. But I am not here to talk to you only about that. I am here to show you the 3 most important steps to gaining confidence easily and effortlessly. These three steps are: awareness, acceptance and action.

Many of us don't always realize how we feel about ourselves. We think we are confident. We look confident on the outside, but if we look in the mirror everyday and try to find everything that is wrong with us than we are not in love with ourselves. If we let other people put us down, feel like we are not good enough in certain things, then we are not confident. So what do we do about it.

The first step is to gain awareness. Gaining awareness is self-power. When you gain awareness, you are ready to begin your transformation. Being aware and awaken that you have this issue, that you feel this way is the most important process in this journey to loving who you are. Ask yourself:

How do I feel about myself today?

Why do I feel this way?

How do I want to feel today and every day?

When you are ready, admit to yourself that you feel this way and that it is alright because now you are taking the first step to changing this attitude about yourself, to start knowing yourself from the inside out. During this transformation, you will explore new parts of your being you never knew you had, talents and abilities that have been hidden inside for so many years, because you probably tried pleasing others and using skills and abilities that were not yours, but other peoples' expectations of you.

So how do we begin? Where do we begin? Begin by your personality. Personally, I started by concentrating on the parts I loved about myself first, than I went gradually to the parts I felt I was ready to accept about myself and so on.

For example, I started by loving my creativity. I am a very creative person full of wonderful ideas and this was the easiest for me to accept, so I began with this personality trait. When you start with small steps like this, your mind can accept it more easily than if you try to do too many things fast. Self-care is a process that takes time, patience and lots of self-nourishment. It is like a plant, if you water it every day, it will grow and become very beautiful, the same goes in the area of confidence. It is important to give yourself the time you need to fully accept a part of yourself. Only when you notice that you are fully comfortable with it, then you can move to the next step.

The next step is to work on your physical self which is the most difficult one especially for women. But don't worry because you are able to overcome it. Again start concentrating on the parts you already love about yourself and start to notice them, for example, your eyes, your eyebrows, anything that you know that you will not be able to contradict. Don't tell me you cannot find anything to love about yourself, we all have at least one part we love about ourselves. Gradually pick one part of yourself that you feel ready to start loving and accepting it. Notice how you feel about that part.

What kind of feelings come up?

How can you transform these feelings into positive ones?

How do you feel about this part of your body when you see other people?

Why you don't like it? What is really bothering you about this person?

The last step is after you have accepted these parts of yourself, you can move on and make a change. It is very easy to change once that you have accepted yourself as you are. You now have the power to work on your strengths and improve parts of yourself. Again, remember to do it gradually, one step at a time. Some parts will be more difficult to change immediately depending on the degree of your acceptance.

Time Management Skills: Flexibility and Gratitude

By: Balance and Joy Life Coach, Sheri McGregor

People think of effective time management as ruled calendar sheets, wristwatches with alarms, and everything timed for perfection. Those may work for some, but let’s face reality. When chained to a desk, and the clock leaves no wriggle room for spur-of-the-moment change, people feel stressed. The mere thought of being late or not completing one thing in time for the next can cause anxiety. Besides, life doesn’t work that way. If it did, we wouldn’t know the old saying about the best laid plans. . . . Inevitably, a customer or colleague arrives late, traffic holds you up, or tasks take more time than expected. The home front may also interfere with your schedule: your child gets sick, the dog decides to wander the neighborhood, or your kitchen pipes break and flood the house. You may feel like there’s just not enough time.

In my life coaching sessions, self-employed and work-at-home clients say there’s not enough time in a day. They seek more effective time management and stress relief. We discuss work-life balance, and the realities of a busy lifestyle as they relate to two of the most overlooked aspects of time management skills: flexibility, and gratitude.

Flexibility is a key component to any time management strategy. That means prioritizing so the important things get done first. Getting the most important items complete, or nearly so, allows us to cultivate a flexible attitude. This, in turn, not only gives us opportunities to get more done, but creates an atmosphere of being open to what happens, reserving worry, and going with the flow.

Here’s one example: Regardless of being in the middle of an important budget analysis, you set the folders aside and keep your commitment to a businessperson with whom you’ve scheduled a telephone meeting. But once on the call, she says she needs five more minutes and will call you back. How do you react? (Be honest!)

In a busy day in which you have managed to remain punctual, irritation is a natural reaction. You may even wonder if five minutes will become ten. This thought creates anxiety. Maybe now the call will go longer than the time you’ve allotted and, like dominoes, bump all your events forward. So, you spend the next five minutes anxious, stressed, and irritated—which won’t help you connect sincerely and effectively when your customer or colleague phones back.

To fix this dilemma, be aware of your thoughts. Instead of getting hung up on what might happen, stay in the moment. You can’t be certain the call will now go longer than planned and ruin your schedule. Instead, keep focused so it won’t. Then, look for something to make effective use of your time now.

With a positive perspective, five minutes of waiting is a gift. Manage your mind to manage your time. Use your time wisely. An attitude of gratitude reduces stress, and keeps you moving forward rather than stalling you in anxious thoughts.

In five minutes, you can put away some unfinished business, such as a couple of books or a folder from the day before. Empty your trash can, perhaps. Or, remove past months’ sheets from your date book, and insert the next month or two. Five minutes is just enough time to put stamps on a stack of envelopes ready to mail, or wind up the cord to your cell phone’s ear buds left in a clump after the morning commute. Pick something small that doesn’t require huge amounts of mental energy that will need another big shift when the telephone meeting restarts. Five minutes of effective time management pay off.

Be flexible, stay in the present, and think of any extra time spans as gifts. Cultivate an attitude of gratitude when it comes to time. In this way, you’re not only using smart time management techniques, but you’re coping with stress.

Enjoy more peace of mind with "Healthy Habits to Balance and Joy," a $29.00 value, yours free at BalanceAndJoy.com.

Discover easy stress management, and overcome chaos. Live with more meaning, and step toward a happier future. You?ll be glad you did.

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